adjective
- Dictionary.com
The word 'homesick,' really seems to imply more that you're sick of home. Which I am.
"Home," is a dumb word because I throw it around so much. "Oh yeah, I'm going home for Christmas." "I'll be home in April." "Back home..." But really, home is transcendent. Home - (God, the word looks so funny now. Reaching the point where you type/say a word too much and it starts to seem like to should not exist.) - is wherever I want it to be, and in my case, I'm far too detached from this place to really consider it home.
Oh no, I really should - I grew up here. My family live here. I've lived here. Half my material possessions in the world are here, as is my dog. Despite all this, my irrational hatred for this city has just meant that I've never felt really that happy or comfortable here.
Home, for me, has become a small room in the corner of a building, decked in fairylights and with curtains that don't match the bedsheets. Home has become an entirely new place - it's no wonder that someone like me, who has felt such detachment from the-place-I-grew-up-in, would latch onto wherever I go next. And I've decided that my own definition of home is the place where - boom, clichés galore - I'm happy/where the heart is blah blah etc. I swear the last 3 months were the happiest I've ever been.
Knowing me, I'll be sick of the UK soon, and will latch, like a leech, onto a new 'host.' (Okay, taking this parasite simile a little far now.) So that'll be wherever it takes me, I guess.
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