so it ends.
Post-modern things I can't relate, like summer camp in coastal states. Alcohol and coffee beans, dance floors and magazines.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Reasons To Smile
(I actually wrote this... quite a long time ago. I've been in a shitty mood all day and was checking my drafts on here when I came across it. How appropriate.) :)
For anyone who's ever felt shitty.
For anyone who's ever felt shitty.
Blame karma. Blame that you were born under an unlucky moon. Blame the boy who broke your heart, the girl who stole him from you, and the friends that didn't tell you. Blame your parents who don't understand. Blame the extra inches creeping around your waist and the increasing stack of 'to-write' essays. Blame first your broken laptop, and then blame the makers of the laptop. Blame everything but yourself. Get increasingly more upset as time passes; every small thing begins to annoy you and you think - no, you know, that you're never going to be happy again and you should just give up because everything sucks and did you mention that it's not fair?
You should smile. Smile because the moment will pass. It may be ten minutes or ten hours. It may be one tub of ice cream and a long nap later. It may be a year and girls' night outs and movies and plenty of you time. Eventually, things will start sucking less and less, until it is just maybe a vague embarrassing memory of that-time-you-lay-face-down-on-your-bed-because-Stephen-didn't-think-you-were-going-to-work-out.
Smile because you've come this far and done whatever much. It doesn't matter if you think you've messed everything up soooooooo bad and nothing will ever be okay again. Smile because you have the power to fix something; you will never have control over every aspect of the world, but there will always be an action you can take, even if it is just dragging your ass down to the mall to cheer yourself up. Smile because you can actually do something. Work those facial muscles and smile just because you bloody can.
Smile for everywhere you're going to go. You will go to your favourite places in your town. You will leave your town and travel the world. You will visit places you've only seen in pictures and pass by towns you've never even heard of. You will learn new things and customs. Smile for all the new food you will eat and you won't like all of it but that's okay.
Smile for everything to come. The classes you'll take, the people you'll meet. The arguments you'll get into. The people you'll fall in love with and the hours you'll spend entangled in each other's arms. The conversations that you'll never forget and the experiences you won't either.
Smile for all the experiences that did not, in fact, break you, but instead made you stronger.
Smile for all the experiences that did not, in fact, break you, but instead made you stronger.
Sunday, January 29, 2012
900%
To make up for the last few posts which were quite text-heavy, this one shall be a spam of photos because someone is far too in love with her fisheye lens.
Yesterday was Chris's birthday, so we celebrated in style by suiting up (so for me, putting on a blazer,) and drinking and ordering curries! ~~!
AWWH, with Jordan :)
All classy in my top hat.
With birthday boy.
Me and Lucinda went for a moonlit stroll. We actually just randomly ran outside. No wonder I always get colds..
The party was cut short when our resident warden came out and told us to clean everything up and stop because we need to sign a form or something for it to be a party, which was lame.
It was still really fun and I managed to take quite a bit over 300 photos because I got a little bit too overexcited. Lots of giggling and girly chats and casual banter. Pretty much lost out on a pound because I was too weak to carry home 2 bottles of sprite. Disappointing.
Yesterday was Chris's birthday, so we celebrated in style by suiting up (so for me, putting on a blazer,) and drinking and ordering curries! ~~!
AWWH, with Jordan :)
All classy in my top hat.
With birthday boy.
Me and Lucinda went for a moonlit stroll. We actually just randomly ran outside. No wonder I always get colds..
The party was cut short when our resident warden came out and told us to clean everything up and stop because we need to sign a form or something for it to be a party, which was lame.
It was still really fun and I managed to take quite a bit over 300 photos because I got a little bit too overexcited. Lots of giggling and girly chats and casual banter. Pretty much lost out on a pound because I was too weak to carry home 2 bottles of sprite. Disappointing.
Saturday, January 28, 2012
February Air
FEBRUARY IS ALMOST UPON US! It seems as time just flies by when you're spending your nights debating philosophy and photo arrangement, or playing vodka pong and call of duty until your battered self-esteem can take no more of the confirmation that you're just awful.
Happy Chinese New Year (belated) to all those who celebrate (kinda rhymes...belate...celebrate...yes? no? okay, fine.) This was the first year I didn't get red packets which was heartbreaking devastating and my mind is failing to comprehend not suddenly having an increase in my funds this time of year... hence my ridiculous eBay and amazon shopping of the moment.
But I did pick up a new lens attachment:
I've wanted a fisheye for ages so I couldn't be happier. Bid on the official canon one but got into a bidding war, and after 10 minutes, I realised I wouldn't be able to handle another 4 days of it as I was already getting increasingly frustrated and wanted to slap my nemesis-bidee in the mouth very badly.
Last week has been good. Night out at Gatecrasher was good fun - although I spent a fair bit of it looking after others - and the whole week was.. same as usual really. I was mortified by my resident warden though - won't go into details, but the people who know what I'm talking about will know what I'm talking about and this is just here in case far in the future, I find it more funny than embarrassing.
Due to a dip in my funds as of late, (result of my ebay spree,) PLUS the fact that it's Chris's bday tonight, I foregoed going out last night in favour of having a chill night in. Beer pong - vodka pong for me cause i'm such a GIRL and I hate beer - and then plans were to watch the pokemon 2000 movie and play the pokemon drinking game which failed because I'd downloaded an awful copy, so we watched Gladiator - a poor choice because it's so damn long.
I made a wonderful omelette today and I'm just sharing that because I'm kitchen impaired and it was a glorious and momentus occasion and therefore should be marked down.
Will finish abruptly with a photo of the challenge I was faced with one morning when I was late to class:
Happy Chinese New Year (belated) to all those who celebrate (kinda rhymes...belate...celebrate...yes? no? okay, fine.) This was the first year I didn't get red packets which was heartbreaking devastating and my mind is failing to comprehend not suddenly having an increase in my funds this time of year... hence my ridiculous eBay and amazon shopping of the moment.
But I did pick up a new lens attachment:
I've wanted a fisheye for ages so I couldn't be happier. Bid on the official canon one but got into a bidding war, and after 10 minutes, I realised I wouldn't be able to handle another 4 days of it as I was already getting increasingly frustrated and wanted to slap my nemesis-bidee in the mouth very badly.
Last week has been good. Night out at Gatecrasher was good fun - although I spent a fair bit of it looking after others - and the whole week was.. same as usual really. I was mortified by my resident warden though - won't go into details, but the people who know what I'm talking about will know what I'm talking about and this is just here in case far in the future, I find it more funny than embarrassing.
Due to a dip in my funds as of late, (result of my ebay spree,) PLUS the fact that it's Chris's bday tonight, I foregoed going out last night in favour of having a chill night in. Beer pong - vodka pong for me cause i'm such a GIRL and I hate beer - and then plans were to watch the pokemon 2000 movie and play the pokemon drinking game which failed because I'd downloaded an awful copy, so we watched Gladiator - a poor choice because it's so damn long.
I made a wonderful omelette today and I'm just sharing that because I'm kitchen impaired and it was a glorious and momentus occasion and therefore should be marked down.
Will finish abruptly with a photo of the challenge I was faced with one morning when I was late to class:
Thursday, January 26, 2012
Home (Double Identity)
Home is an apartment overlooking the sea. The winds are stronger and it's colder but that's all fine by me. This home is a large room with an ocean view and a careful colour scheme: red, brown and cream. The wonky top shelf - please don't fall down - and the lamp I bang my head on constantly. Sliding closet doors, (the right one always gets stuck a little,) and the windy walk down to the front door. The gas station opposite and the park down the road.
Home is an urban landscape with skyscrapers by the dozen. The constant presence and motion of people and I wonder where they're all going and what they're doing here. The constant buzz of traffic as vehicles of varying sizes and styles head in all directions carrying all sorts of people. Home is the multitude of shops and the overwhelming bombardment of advertisements everywhere. Home is a consumerist capital and if you walk slowly you'll fall behind.
Home is sitting in coffee shops with your friends. Walking around the streets and grabbing each other in an effort to not get swept away in the people-sea. Laughing at people in clubs and shouting over loud music in attempts to have your gossip-conversation right now. Finding grass and sitting in it just because it's so rare and lying down and then it goes everywhere but you don't mind.
Home is green grass and blue - sometimes grey - skies. Large fields and trees and grass and all that picturesque imagery that comes to mind when you think of nature, you know? Walking on an empty sidewalk with no one all around and seeing your breath as you inhale, exhale. Finding everything closed on a sunday morning and the emptiness that's all around simultaneously eerie and relaxing.
Home is a box room at the end of a corridor which is cleaned once, twice, three times a day. Fairylights - the ones by the window always fall down - light it up once it gets dark and the only space on the walls are gaps between pictures. This home is a visual clash of colour but you got over it a long time ago . The overspilling closet and the guitar in the corner which is strummed occasionally but carefully in case the neighbours overhear. Newspaper covered branches tower over a laptop where you sit writing your thoughts down.
Home is deliberately falling asleep in film screenings and whispering through them with your friends as you sit in YOUR designated row (2nd from back, always.) Sitting on other people's beds after you've made them or fighting over a good spot for a film. Sitting on the floor of the corridor with a crowd that multiplies and grows as people leave and join. Dancing around the kitchen when it's crowded and trying desperately not to scald or be scalded with a hot saucepan. Talking about philosophy and life and things so inconsequential and unimportant that they stand out more in your mind and become important.
Home is the inside of your head. Your thoughts fly free and derailed and your opinions are your own. Your transatlantic dreams and hopes and aspirations and your future is all mapped out in the vaguest of ways. Your ideas and your writings and your work space and all your thoughts which are so articulated and elegant in your head but just so awkward when they leave that safety net. This home is with you wherever you go.
Home is an urban landscape with skyscrapers by the dozen. The constant presence and motion of people and I wonder where they're all going and what they're doing here. The constant buzz of traffic as vehicles of varying sizes and styles head in all directions carrying all sorts of people. Home is the multitude of shops and the overwhelming bombardment of advertisements everywhere. Home is a consumerist capital and if you walk slowly you'll fall behind.
Home is sitting in coffee shops with your friends. Walking around the streets and grabbing each other in an effort to not get swept away in the people-sea. Laughing at people in clubs and shouting over loud music in attempts to have your gossip-conversation right now. Finding grass and sitting in it just because it's so rare and lying down and then it goes everywhere but you don't mind.
---------------
Home is green grass and blue - sometimes grey - skies. Large fields and trees and grass and all that picturesque imagery that comes to mind when you think of nature, you know? Walking on an empty sidewalk with no one all around and seeing your breath as you inhale, exhale. Finding everything closed on a sunday morning and the emptiness that's all around simultaneously eerie and relaxing.
Home is a box room at the end of a corridor which is cleaned once, twice, three times a day. Fairylights - the ones by the window always fall down - light it up once it gets dark and the only space on the walls are gaps between pictures. This home is a visual clash of colour but you got over it a long time ago . The overspilling closet and the guitar in the corner which is strummed occasionally but carefully in case the neighbours overhear. Newspaper covered branches tower over a laptop where you sit writing your thoughts down.
Home is deliberately falling asleep in film screenings and whispering through them with your friends as you sit in YOUR designated row (2nd from back, always.) Sitting on other people's beds after you've made them or fighting over a good spot for a film. Sitting on the floor of the corridor with a crowd that multiplies and grows as people leave and join. Dancing around the kitchen when it's crowded and trying desperately not to scald or be scalded with a hot saucepan. Talking about philosophy and life and things so inconsequential and unimportant that they stand out more in your mind and become important.
Home is the inside of your head. Your thoughts fly free and derailed and your opinions are your own. Your transatlantic dreams and hopes and aspirations and your future is all mapped out in the vaguest of ways. Your ideas and your writings and your work space and all your thoughts which are so articulated and elegant in your head but just so awkward when they leave that safety net. This home is with you wherever you go.
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Today Was Sub-Zero
Sigh, back to non-blogging.
Or at least being more shit at it although it's just been a week since my last blog to be fair. Halls are a deserted wasteland anytime before midday (and usually a fair bit after) on the weekends, so I've got some time to kill. Without further ado, whee, backtrack!
(a) Bringing the wii to uni was simultaneously best/worst idea ever. We've had intense mariokart races, with some of the highlights being:
- Sam (shit) losing to me (shit) then beating Jordan (good) and then losing to Dom (never played before)
- Toby throwing a minor tantrum upon being 1st and then crashing into the finishing post and being overtaken.
- Matt, usually one of the most chill people ever, getting increasingly frustrated and finally stating that he'd never felt such anger before.
- Me and Mikayla managing to get a whole 3 points between the two of us the first 3 races of a team races.
- And then us both driving straight into the water at the same time.
Forgot Marioparty, but it wouldn't have worked anyway. Going to try get it in the hopes that I'll be able to redeem myself somewhat after always performing abysmally on mariokart. I should never be allowed on the roads.
(b) Had my wallet stolen on Monday (my first night out.) Mama and Papa were not pleased at all and have only just started speaking to me without hostility after I gave them the news of my good work. Had to cancel bank cards and it's now a pain to get money out. And my beautiful new 18+ hkid is now gone. We were together for a beautiful two weeks.
(c) Despite that, had a really good night out last night. Almost everyone was there, saw a couple of the film friends, and had both Sophie and Nathan came out with us which was good. We had some lovely girly conversations which was nice and it was just nice and the word nice is beginning to start not looking like a word now because I've used it too much. Which is not nice.
(d) Official'd everything with the boy and I started girlfriend duties off very well by managing to spill cheese sauce on him 4 times and hijacking his HDMI cable so I can play my ps3 again, (when taking a break from the wii,) and here's a cute picture taken by mikayla of our backs whilst playing Akham City...
Apart from all that - first week has been un... was going to say uneventful, but it really wasn't. Back into the swing of things, back to lectures and waking up early JUST KIDDING I don't really sleep do I, and chilling with my hallmates and going to Tesco, although my money situation means I have to go all the way down to the bank to get money out which is lame and dumb.
Currently waiting for Portia, who you, blog, are pretty well acquainted with, to come and visit for the weekend! Heading out to the SU for an event tonight, and then probably just going to chill and show her fun uni days - although like I said, weekends are actually pretty quiet. Which is understandable after last night, I guess.
Or at least being more shit at it although it's just been a week since my last blog to be fair. Halls are a deserted wasteland anytime before midday (and usually a fair bit after) on the weekends, so I've got some time to kill. Without further ado, whee, backtrack!
(a) Bringing the wii to uni was simultaneously best/worst idea ever. We've had intense mariokart races, with some of the highlights being:
- Sam (shit) losing to me (shit) then beating Jordan (good) and then losing to Dom (never played before)
- Toby throwing a minor tantrum upon being 1st and then crashing into the finishing post and being overtaken.
- Matt, usually one of the most chill people ever, getting increasingly frustrated and finally stating that he'd never felt such anger before.
- Me and Mikayla managing to get a whole 3 points between the two of us the first 3 races of a team races.
- And then us both driving straight into the water at the same time.
Forgot Marioparty, but it wouldn't have worked anyway. Going to try get it in the hopes that I'll be able to redeem myself somewhat after always performing abysmally on mariokart. I should never be allowed on the roads.
(b) Had my wallet stolen on Monday (my first night out.) Mama and Papa were not pleased at all and have only just started speaking to me without hostility after I gave them the news of my good work. Had to cancel bank cards and it's now a pain to get money out. And my beautiful new 18+ hkid is now gone. We were together for a beautiful two weeks.
(c) Despite that, had a really good night out last night. Almost everyone was there, saw a couple of the film friends, and had both Sophie and Nathan came out with us which was good. We had some lovely girly conversations which was nice and it was just nice and the word nice is beginning to start not looking like a word now because I've used it too much. Which is not nice.
(d) Official'd everything with the boy and I started girlfriend duties off very well by managing to spill cheese sauce on him 4 times and hijacking his HDMI cable so I can play my ps3 again, (when taking a break from the wii,) and here's a cute picture taken by mikayla of our backs whilst playing Akham City...
Apart from all that - first week has been un... was going to say uneventful, but it really wasn't. Back into the swing of things, back to lectures and waking up early JUST KIDDING I don't really sleep do I, and chilling with my hallmates and going to Tesco, although my money situation means I have to go all the way down to the bank to get money out which is lame and dumb.
Currently waiting for Portia, who you, blog, are pretty well acquainted with, to come and visit for the weekend! Heading out to the SU for an event tonight, and then probably just going to chill and show her fun uni days - although like I said, weekends are actually pretty quiet. Which is understandable after last night, I guess.
Friday, January 6, 2012
TRAVEL LIVEBLOG
~~Breaking news~~ LIVEBLOGGING today from Heathrow Airport. After a 12 hour flight, incredibly quick immigration and baggage pickup procedure, Eurasian girl, 18, breaks down and succumbs to boredom, paying £7 for internet as she is doomed to wait another 2 hours.
(Talk about a first world problem,)
Okay - last few days prior to my departure went without any notable incident, HENCE lack of blog updates no-i-was-not-being-lazy-fuck-you. I did some shopping (I bought a ridiculous amount of pajamas and i'm not sure why??) and met up with Izzy and Ollie and I don't know who else because my dates are all muddled. I've just traveled back in time, bear with me.
So: plane ride was actually okay. I'd stayed up for 30 something hours so I was tired ~clever strategy~ and with my bigger seats and all the jackets I was carrying on my person (packed with a 'if it doesn't fit in the suitcase I'M WEARING IT' mentality,) meant I was able to sort of sleep - really more of a state of hypnogogia really but close enough. The films were okay but then again, I watched the Lion King so they were really more than okay. There was also a ton of room so the person next to me moved the row over and then I didn't have a seat in front of me so there was an absence of the usually-present-dickwad-who-puts-their-chair-as-far-back-as-they-can-the-whole-flight which was very, very welcome.
I did startle myself though. Due to lack of seat in front, tv and tray were stored in the cute handrests. When dinner came, I opened one and spent about 5 minutes trying to get my tray out. It had a push here button so I prodded it a bit and then finally smacked it and it flew up and surprised me. Even better, it was the tv...
Upon arrival, I knew I had time to kill, so I decided to take my time. Unfortunately, the universe likes to work against me because every time I try to take my time, I end up being ridiculously early. So then now I have a 3 hour wait for the coach! ... Then a 2 hour coach ride, then cab ride, before I'm finally back in my uni room WHICH NEEDS TO BE UNPACKED AND SORTED AND CLEANED. God damn it.
Went through duty free and picked up the cutest little absolut baby vodka set of 1 of each flavour <3 Shall definitely be put to good use. I would take a picture right now but that would probably just look really weird.
So, now I have an hour and a bit! I killed quite a bit of time blu-tacking the back of my photos (which I'd packed in my hand baggage for this purpose,) and I think now, I will make a list of possible things to do when waiting at Heathrow Airport (and then maybe do some of them.)
So:
Okay, so there's not that much. I was super bored earlier, and therefore why I actually paid money to use internet. Time is suddenly passing by faster! ~~!
On a last note before I... go... maybe do some of my list, traveling by yourself SUCKS for one reason... what the fuck do I do with my baggage!!! Not meant to leave my baggage unattended but I have quite a lot and what if I need to pee... sigh, hard life.
(Talk about a first world problem,)
Okay - last few days prior to my departure went without any notable incident, HENCE lack of blog updates no-i-was-not-being-lazy-fuck-you. I did some shopping (I bought a ridiculous amount of pajamas and i'm not sure why??) and met up with Izzy and Ollie and I don't know who else because my dates are all muddled. I've just traveled back in time, bear with me.
So: plane ride was actually okay. I'd stayed up for 30 something hours so I was tired ~clever strategy~ and with my bigger seats and all the jackets I was carrying on my person (packed with a 'if it doesn't fit in the suitcase I'M WEARING IT' mentality,) meant I was able to sort of sleep - really more of a state of hypnogogia really but close enough. The films were okay but then again, I watched the Lion King so they were really more than okay. There was also a ton of room so the person next to me moved the row over and then I didn't have a seat in front of me so there was an absence of the usually-present-dickwad-who-puts-their-chair-as-far-back-as-they-can-the-whole-flight which was very, very welcome.
I did startle myself though. Due to lack of seat in front, tv and tray were stored in the cute handrests. When dinner came, I opened one and spent about 5 minutes trying to get my tray out. It had a push here button so I prodded it a bit and then finally smacked it and it flew up and surprised me. Even better, it was the tv...
Upon arrival, I knew I had time to kill, so I decided to take my time. Unfortunately, the universe likes to work against me because every time I try to take my time, I end up being ridiculously early. So then now I have a 3 hour wait for the coach! ... Then a 2 hour coach ride, then cab ride, before I'm finally back in my uni room WHICH NEEDS TO BE UNPACKED AND SORTED AND CLEANED. God damn it.
Went through duty free and picked up the cutest little absolut baby vodka set of 1 of each flavour <3 Shall definitely be put to good use. I would take a picture right now but that would probably just look really weird.
So, now I have an hour and a bit! I killed quite a bit of time blu-tacking the back of my photos (which I'd packed in my hand baggage for this purpose,) and I think now, I will make a list of possible things to do when waiting at Heathrow Airport (and then maybe do some of them.)
So:
Possible Things To Do When Waiting At Heathrow Airport
(1) Go to all two of the money exchange places. Exchange my $500. Count my money. (Not being sarcastic, I genuinely love doing this.)
(2) Go stand in front of the ben & jerry's machine and spend 5 minutes debating a flavour before finally choosing one. Proceed to eat it in about 40 seconds. (Will definitely do this one.)
(3) Drink the whole of the Baileys I bought duty free and just get drunk and hope time passes really quickly. (Being sarcastic, I will definitely not do this one... massive waste of alcohol.)
(4) Go buy food then eat it. (Will most likely do this one.)
Okay, so there's not that much. I was super bored earlier, and therefore why I actually paid money to use internet. Time is suddenly passing by faster! ~~!
On a last note before I... go... maybe do some of my list, traveling by yourself SUCKS for one reason... what the fuck do I do with my baggage!!! Not meant to leave my baggage unattended but I have quite a lot and what if I need to pee... sigh, hard life.
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